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Santa Singh was walking on the road and paused to read the graffiti on the wall. It read "Padne waala gadha."(one who reads it is an ass.)

Santa Singh thought for an hour, erased it and wrote back, "Likhne waala gadha." (One who wrote it is an ass).

goodforu

Santa and Banta had just bought two horses. Now the problem was that they could not differenciate between the two horses.

Santa cuts the left ear of his horse, so that it is easy to know that it is his horse. While doing so, an enemy of Santa looks at him. This enemy also cuts the left ear of banta's horse. By doing so santa and banta come in confusion to differenciate.

In his effort to differenciate the horses Santa keeps on cutting his horse's right ear, then his tail , then makes him blind and so on. The enemy also kept on doing so with banta's horse.

At last Santa's horse had no legs left and banta's horse was with one leg only. The enemy also went and cut banta's horse one leg.

So, in the morning it was the same sitaution! How to diffrenciate thier horses.

After thinking and putting lots of effort to thier mind - Santa said - O.K You keep the black one and i will keep the white .

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Santa Singh : 'Look Banta, what type of glasses they have made. The top is closed. How can you fill lassi in it ?

Banta Singh : 'Yes, that's funny. And even if you make a hole at the top, how will the lassi stay in the glass when the bottom is open?'

amitesh ghate

i love Santa Banta series yar
keep posting

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goodforu

Santa : People consider me as a "GOD"

Banta : How do you know??

Santa : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD ! U have came again..

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Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.

Banta: Santa u'll die.

Santa: U'll die bcoz haven't u heard train is coming on platform?

goodforu

sure here you go!! I have many of them!

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Letter from mother to son Santa Singh.

Pyare Puttar, Vahe Guru. I am writing this letter slow, because I know you can't read fast. We do not live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen 20 miles from your home, so we moved. I wont be able to send you the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the numbers with them for their next house, so they would not have to change their address.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I am not sure it works too well. Last week I put 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since then. The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained 3 days, and the second time for 4 days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.

We got another bill from the funeral home. It said if we don't make the last payment on grandma's funeral, he will come up again. Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting grass at the cemetery . Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it's a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle. Your uncle Jatinder fell in a whisky vat. Some men tried pulling him out, but he fought them off and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days. There is not much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

LoveMom.

P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already sealed.

goodforu

Santa Singh was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Banta. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly
handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then he died. Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Banta singh was visting Santa's family.

He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all."

He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standingon my oxygen tube!"

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Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

> 1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field. We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****. I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the password is.

> 2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down ' button.

> 3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.

> 4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run' and has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.

> 5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

> 6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find', but unable to trace. Is it a bug??

> 7. Every night I am not sleeping as I have to protect my 'mouse' from CAT, So I suggest u to provide one DOG to kill that cat.

> 8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning 'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to collect ur money.

> 9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when u will provide that?

Best regards,
Banta Singh

goodforu

Santa Singh is called for an interview in some firm. He lands there on time. He is immediately hauled inside in front of the interviewing officer. Officer looks at Santa Singh then goes through his certificates and then starts asking him questions.

Following is the transcript :
O : Mr. Santa Singh, after seeing your qualifications & credentials I would like to ask you only some simple questions. If you can answer those then you are selected. First we will start with some opposites
S : Yes Sir.

Officer started asking questions
O : Above
S : Below

O : Front
S : Back

O : Left
S : Right

O : Male
S : Female

O : Ugly (means Next in Punjabi)
S : Pichhly (means Previous in Punjabi)

O : Ugly...U-G-L-Y( Officer spells it)
S : Pichhly...P-I-C-H-H-L-Y( Our Sardar also spells it)

O : U.....G.....L ...... Y.....(Officer shouts)
S : P ..... I ..... C ..... H ....... H ...... L ..... Y...... Our Sardar also shouts) Officer is now angry.

O : Get out
S : Come in.

O : Quiet please.
S : Talk please.

O : You are rejected.
S : I am selected
....... ....... and This is how Santa Singh got his job.

achilies

Lol...................

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