angel228

FORREST GUMP GOES TO HEAVEN


The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump
dies and goes to Heaven.

He is at the Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter
himself.
However, the gates are closed, and Forrest
approaches the gatekeeper.


St. Peter said, "Well, Forrest,
it is certainly good to see you. We have
heard a lot about you.
I must tell you, though, that the place is
filling up fast, and we have been
administering an entrance examination for
everyone.
The test is short, but you have to pass it
before you can get into Heaven."


Forrest responds, "It sure is good to be
here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody ever told
me about any entrance exam.
I sure hope that the test ain't too hard.


Life was a big enough test as it was."


St. Peter continued, "Yes, I know, Forrest,
but the test is only three questions.

First:

What two days of the week begin with the
letter T?



Second:

How many seconds are there in a year?


Third:

What is God's first name?"


Forrest leaves to think the questions over.
He returns the next day and sees St. Peter,
who waves him up, and says, "Now that you
have had a chance to think the questions
over, tell me your answers"


Forrest replied, "Well, the first one --
which two days in the week begins with the
letter "T"?

Shucks, that one is easy. That would be
Today and Tomorrow."


The Saint's eyes opened wide and he
exclaimed, "Forrest, that is not what I was
thinking, but you do have a point, and I
guess I did not specify, so I will give you
credit for that answer.

How about the next one?" asked St. Peter.


"How many seconds in a year?

Now that one is harder," replied Forrest,
but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess
the only answer can be twelve."


Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve?

Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name
could you come up with twelve seconds in a
year?"


Forrest replied, "Shucks, there's
got to be twelve: January 2nd, February 2nd,
March 2nd... "


"Hold it," interrupts St.Peter.
"I see where you are going with this, and I
see your point,
though that was not quite what I had in
mind....but I will have to give you credit
for that one, too.

Let us go on with the third and final
question.

Can you tell me God's first name"?


"Sure," Forrest replied,

"it's Andy."


"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated

and frustrated St Peter.


"Ok, I can understand how you came up
with your answers to my first two questions,
but just how in the world did you come up
with the name Andy as the first name of
God?"


"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all,"
Forrest replied. "I learnt it from the song,

"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS
WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."


St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates,

and said: "Run Forrest, run."

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